L a s t S u m m e r;

Sunday, July 30, 2006

petience

she pisses me off sosososos much i feel like KILLING her. i meant not as if that tot never crossed my mind since sec 1 but GOD. she's such a _____. i shall not say it. coz what's he use of cursing her in this god forsaken blog??? LOL. i feel like doing something real mean but no. think i shall just pray she gets what she deserves. good shall triumph over evil. MUAHAHAHA. damn. what a pain in the butt.

life's getting more complicated but i'd rather just keep my lips sealed. actions speaks louder than words.

URGH. god. i cant keep this evil thoughts abt her away from my brain. i feel like cursing but wadeva. what's the point? i have much more brains than her cursing about like a lil brat. HAH! im evil.

i shall stay patient

will someone take my hand

and guide me there?

xx signed off at 11:10 AM

Friday, July 28, 2006

numbed=

im trying so hard to understand. really. but it's hard. how can i convince myself to that we can pull thru when i have doubts? urgh. can someone knock some sense into my HEAD? WHAT AM I SUPPOSD TO DO? sigh. im numbed. dont know what to sae. dont know what to do. rather just leave it up to god. haha. tried my best.

gotta say thanx to fairul coz he's gonna help me contact tht friend back. i just want to know how he is...........

ah kong sitting beside me. LOL. shall enjoy torturing him. muahahahaha.

could see the resentment in their eyes. but who cares? i certainly dont. it is plain jealousy. hah! they can go rot elsewhere coz the ugly facial expressions do not bother me. they underestimated the powr of my will.

liver cirrhosis. wadeva that is. sighx.

will someone take my hand

and guide me there?

xx signed off at 1:47 PM

Thursday, July 27, 2006

emptiness

the anger drained my energy. urgh.
still love poh li & mariam tho for diverting my anger away. *hugs* u guys rule!

there is nothing left to sae

allow the silence

to speak for itself

wilting like a dry rose.

xx signed off at 5:50 PM

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

i feel BAD.

yes. real bad. sigh. guilt is undeniably the best waepon to use for revenge. i KNOW he's not out to get me but i feel SOOOOO bad. serious. just cannot seem to bear the look on his face and to think that i ever hurt him. hope he gets well soon=(

havent been sleeping well. both granny's in hosp. haix. going tan tock seng every night now but it certainly is a strain noe that there's so much WORK to do. and not forgettin that i have 4 tests per day AND i have the national day rehearsals. and i keep pushing my werk aside. can you believe i have stopped all self-revision for the past 3 nights? and im struggling to complete all the homework AND try to stay awake in skul. urgh.

so yes. i do feel...

bad
tireed
sleepy
angry
sad
frustrated
bad

sigh. when is this ever gonna end??

curse the man that treated HER like a piece of shit. my blood boils at the mention of his name. *frustrated

mt olevel results in a week.

better be going. promised to teach jt&mariam poa. sigh.

will someone take my hand

and guide me there?

xx signed off at 2:25 PM

Sunday, July 23, 2006

*elated

nothing beats being IN love.

especially after so long.

amazing how we are still stogether after so much and also after going thru so much. you never cease to amaze me with the patience and responsibility you have. seriously. how can ANY man possibly put up with me? haha. im still wondering after so long how you manage to see thru my faults.

tht makes you special. you and only YOU can see thru me.

*lurb you lotx

still cannot believe that i even tot of doin THT to him

sorie=z

anyway. enuff about love. hahax.

promised to blog at floorball right. abit slow but reali didnt have the time to blog sooner. so yea. 4E2 WON! i mean not technically since we drawed with 5n2 but wad d heck right? hahax. it was reali funny since we didnt expect to go this far when we enterd. we only had 2 practices before this and we had exactly 10 players. hahax. not much for substitute bt we played a fair game and gave evryone a chance to play. i almost didnt get to play since i DIDNT bring my pe attire but thnk god there was hafiz's shirt and becky's shorts.

tnx so much you too! haha.

ihsan was like the BEST keeper and zuan zhe was simply SUPERB. 4E2 had GREAT nad excellent temawork. GOOD job you guys.

unfortunately, the game cost me a friend. had a fight after a game against his class. i truly think it was dumb and even apologized but he ignored so what's d point? i've done my part. it's his loss for not accepting my apology. 3 years of a friendship gone down a drain. sigh.

made it up with him ystrdae. so you can see how much better i feel. my spirits seem to be lifted up higher thatn the sky. hahax. yes. tht's how much his love means to me. am really proud of him=D

it is apparent that FINALLY some people are waking up to the pressures of the O's. think they must be thick skin before this since they felt no pressure and only do when it's about a month away from the prelims. haha. i've been horribly stressed with the amount of work given out in class. just imagine. 3 mock exams and 1 test alone on tues. how can the teachers expect us to study for 4 diffrent subx and to rbr them for the dae?? it really is taking a toll on me. people think my results are good enough but it never will be. im aiming to go to a good JC so i cant possibly do that with an L1r5 of 19 right? sometimes i jsut dont understand people. or maybe because i simply dont fit in the group of friends im in. perhaps we all cme from extremely siffrent backgrounds and mine is exceptional so it's reali hard for me to truly fit in a certain clique.

i am satisfied with the position of my life now. yes. i am facing some problems but wad better than make the best out of it right? like he always says "think positive" haha!

will blog again tomorrow i suppose since i dont have anything on after skul=)

am braindead now coz just did poa and math. fuh!!

better be off.

toodleSs

with you by my side

i can overcome all obstacles

p.s cnt sms much to my most sincere apologies to aziz and all those that sms me n i didnt reply. SORIE!!!

xx signed off at 3:17 PM

Friday, July 21, 2006

sadness

~~we're falling apart~~

it's been a long while

since i last let go

and just gave up

and now..

im on the verge of doin it all again.

had a fight wit a very treasured friend. another person out of my life.

*lost without you

the sadness felt within cannot be placed to words. i'd rather you cut me open and let me bleed than leave it all within. suffering in silence.

xx signed off at 1:02 PM

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

URGH!!!!!!!!

URGH.

im supposed to be ecstatic that 4E2 WON the floorball competetion today BUT the ****ing MSN would NOT run. was just hoping to get some pics taken aft the competition from becky BUT the MSN SPILED it all. GOD. im SUPERRRR frustrated!!!

it's like i switched on the computer. and had to restart/log off for about 5 times before i could actually connect to the net. god. how infuriating.

i'd love to blog about the details of the EXCELLENT(tho i injured myself) competition BUT i wanna figure out wad the hell is wrong with MSN. so i'll blog some other day. muack!

YEAH. HE owes me lunch=P

*took this from amirah's webbie. sorie babe! hope you dun mind=)

--yep2 that's da 7 of us that's been together for the past 4 years. crazee peeps.

~~tkde lain keje cabot recess to amik gbr pat toilet. HAHA! =P~~

p.s that was the pic i wanted to put up last week but had troubles doing so.

xx signed off at 5:26 PM

Monday, July 17, 2006

--the big O

lol. olevel listenin is in the afternoon todae at 4.30. kindda scaree but im not really nervous. after all it is just a listening exercie. it's all in the MINd. remember. mind over body. haha!

nothing much happened. oh btw. i entrd the floorball competition! woohoo! hahax. but im not that keen into playing lah. mainly entered for the fun of it. and anyway. i'd rather be on the reserves since i've promised to help jun ting and mariam with p.o.a every wed. teaching helps a person to learn alot. really. and i need the extra help especially since im not on the night classes or the poa classes.

mainly coz i have a curfew at 7--latest. and that im certainly not allowed to study with friends after dark. i believe the night classes would truly help since it actually trains you to have the discipline. when you're at home, u tend to get distracted by tv shows, food, sleep, etc. like me. just to prove my point, i wun be studying after 10 coz there's Desperate housewive (my fav tv programme) and most of the time i cant be bothered to study after that since im too tired. so you see, it IS better to have the night classes which my parents wil NEVER allow me to even speak of it unless there's a formal letter acknowledgin my essential attndence.

yusa just gave me a call asking if i'd come down to acc him till the listening starts but i dun feel like it. other times i might have done that but todae i feel lazy. would rather blog and laze around eating than rudh to go down and entertain him. haha! ihe's a really3 nice companion but perhaps just not today. hehe.

had a talk with a certain friend in school todae. a certain filthy rich friend. i understand his dilemma but i cant really help him unless he helps himself. yes. it is true. money cant but happiness and i totally undrstd him but i doubt he can ever admit that deep down he's alone and in search of a true companion that can satisfy his needs. all that flirting and endless string of girls serves to show that he just needs someone to fill his time and heart, even for a brief moment.

~~truly miss him todae. and i really feel so GUILTY. haix. am i a bad gf? haixx. maybe i should tell him. but would he undrstd? sigh. i really do love him..................~~

in love

comes sacrifices

xx signed off at 2:05 PM

Sunday, July 16, 2006

relationships

im in awe of the diffrent couples i've come across in life.

especially a certain couple that happens to be a friend.

they're really so loving i have to admit im a tad jealous.
they've been together for a few months. not sure how long but really. it's like they're soooo romantic.

you see. this is what happens when you indulge yourself in a relationship for an extended period of time. especially when it's more than a year. all sense of 'romance' practically has gone down the drain. and you can only see a flicker of it left, which will extinguish if you dont maintain the love between the hearts.
listen.
i am speaking of relationships. NOT marriage. that is totally a diffrent story. mainly because when you're married, u're forced to commit your ENTIRE life and if you dont spice things up..then too bad coz u'll end up in the divorce courts.

why do i have such a strong opinion on this topic?
well. mainly because, it's happening to me.
when you know you love someone and that person is already yours, you tend to forget that the person may also leave you at any point of time. poeple tend to simply ASSUME that their g.f/b.f will be with them together.
that's when i strike. i hate to be second fiddle and i believe that i deserve every respect and attention a partner has to shower on me. tell me. do i really deserve any less? i think EVERY girl deserves that in a relationship.

so please, ladies. if the men aint treating you right. it's time to sae sayonara.

LOL.
perhaps i am abit too demanding.
but i do want & need the attention. sigh.

just tell me. can a person be so busy STUDYING day in and out that he cannot even reply one pathetic sms saying he's bz and needs to study. like HELLO. i'll get the message and i wun bug him. im not desperate for god's sake. but i do need to noe right? what will 1 minute cost to just type
"im busy. cant sms right now. sorry!"

gosh. "-.-

*i feel guilty*

~~perhaps im simply too demanding~~

i know he loves me.

~~sigh.~~

xx signed off at 5:01 PM

Friday, July 14, 2006

...

figuring out ways to use Live Messenger. *ponders*

damn. no partner to go gym with. and HE wun let me go alone. *sobx*

wad a sad sad dae

xx signed off at 2:30 PM

Thursday, July 13, 2006

*high*

hmm. it irritates me when i cant load my pics on the bloggie. hmm. was just about to show sum crazee pics i took at skul wit my close friends.

todae was a very quiet day for me too. wei2 askd if i was in a bad mood. well. NO. but i just wanted to be "unattached". just feel super distant. and i seriously dont know why. sigh.

--silence speaks more than noise

my baby made my dae a whole LOT betta. finally met him just now after school. around 4.30. i feel a million times betta and we didnt even talk much. guess his presence just gives me a familiarity that none can ever provide. muack!

p.s~went to the dentist now. glad that my teeth is fine and all she had to do was a bit of cleaning! =)

happier dae after i met yan but still feeling a tad distant.

*my mind seems to have taken a holiday at mars

oh ya!! i keep forgetting to thank FIZ for gifting me with the watch!! haha,. superr sweet of him and i simply adore the watch. (",)

had another weird dream ystrdae night. all about snakes again. but this time they were on display. strange tink was all the snakes i dreamt of in the past were the same 'species'. sigh. they sae a snake represents a man. *ponders* i wonder...

btw. ishak ahmad passed away this mornin(if im not wrong) at jakarta while shooting. he had a heart attack. and this is not a rumour. it's true. smoga roh nye dicucuri rahmat. amin.

the clouds drifted

my mind wandered

and guess where it landed back at?

y.o.u

xx signed off at 5:50 PM

*aww

Article 1: Statement of Love: The Kiss

1. Kiss on the hand I adore you
2. Kiss on the cheek I just want to be friends
3. Kiss on the neck I want you
4. Kiss on the lips I love you
5. Kiss on the ears I am just playing
6. Kiss anywhere else lets not get carried away
7. Look in your eyes kiss me
8. Playing with your hair I can't live without you
9. Hand on your waist I love you to much to let you go

Article 2: The Three Steps

1. Girls: If any guys gets fresh with you, slap him.
2. Guys If any girl slaps you, her intentions are still good.
3. Guys & Girls Close your eyes when kissing, it is rude to stare .....

Here are a few reasons why guys like girls:

1. They will always smell good even if its just shampoo
2. The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder
3. How cute they look when they sleep
4. The ease in which they fit into our arms
5. The way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world 6. How cute they are when they eat
7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end it makes it all worth while
8. Because they are always warm even when its minus 30 outside
9. The way they look good no matter what they wear
10. The way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful thing on this earth
11. How cute they are when they argue
12. The way her hand always finds yours
13. The way they smile
14. The way you feel when you see their name on the call ID after you just had a big fight
15. The way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know that an hour later....
16. The way they kiss when you do something nice for them
17. The way they kiss you when you say "I love you"
18. Actually ... just the way they kiss you... 1
9. The way they fall into your arms when they cry
20. Then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly
21. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt
22. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt. (even though we don't admit it)!
23. The way they say "I miss you"
24. The way you miss them
25. The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore.....

Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them ... it matters not. Because once in your life, whatever they were to the world they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes, traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without trace of a sound, you know that your own life is inevitable consumed within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart. We love them for a million reasons, No paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of the mind but of the heart. A feeling. Only felt.

xx signed off at 5:43 PM

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

incomplete

--didnt meet him today. rejected saying i wasnt feeling well. sigh.

i need some alone time.

*and when i close my eyes. i feel you near. i need you to sae evything will be alright*

Never even thought to cry
When I heard you say goodbye
Never said where you were going

There's no laughter in the air
Only silence everywhere
And so much left unspoken

Since you've been gone
I haven't been the same
I wish that i could see
Who's to blame

Without you, where do I belong?
Without you, how can I go on?
And No love but yours will ever do
Tell me how am i supposed to live my life?
Without you

Was I lost in you and me
To the point i couldn't see
That what we had was dying
Now it's all that I can do
To see photographs of you

And stop myself from crying
I should learn to live without your love
Got so many memories
But it's not enough

Without you, where do i belong?
Without you, how can i go on?
And No love but yours will ever do
Tell me how am I supposed to live my life
Without you?

I feel helpless and, oh, so all alone
Like I've never felt before
You made me feel alive
But I don't remember what it's like anymore

Without you, where do I belong?
Without you, how can I go on?
And No love but yours will ever do
Tell me how am I supposed to live my life

Without you?
Without you, where do I belong?
Without you, how can I go on?
Tell me how am I supposed to live my life
Without you?

Oh baby where do I belong?
Please tell how can I go on?
Without you...

hold me close and never let go

if only.....

xx signed off at 3:30 PM

`strength

--i pray for strength each dae to breeze the toughest moments in a journey called life--

okok. i should stop being so philosophical. think i hang too much around aziz. haha!

normal day todae. feeling less tired and i FINALLY was able to wake up this morning without feeling real tired and sleepy. BUT i was still a lil groggy in school todae. guess it's coz of the weather. so warm and cosy. reali. makes you just wanna to snuggle up with someone special drinking hot chocolate. haha. i've been watching too many romance movies. haha.

gotta admit im worried for my lil bro. he's taking the psle's this year and he seems so nonchalent about it. sigh. i just wished he had more discipline and commitment and maybe more manners. serious. sometimes i just wanna cry for him.
amazing how sumone you love can say such tactless things despite the things you do for them.
haix.

i've learnt to be grateful. don't ask me why. i just woke up one morning and just felt grateful for evrything life has to offer-good or bad. i dont question god or life anymore and i learn to take things as it is=)

didnt have the mood to talk much todae. not so sure why. i felt like i was tongue-tied. guess sometimes it's the words that you dont say that speaks millions. i guess i just want to put the message across to some people that's been stepping all over me. best not to say anything. they shall receive their retribution when the time comes. LOL.

the world is cruel and i've come to terms with that. also accepted that people are hypocrites. ALL of them. but what the heck right? realised that i should never let down the barricade around me. too many heartbreaks taught me the harsh reality of life.

i really miss lin. guess im just feeling a tad lonely todae. cant reali relate to anyone. sighx.
i jsut feel reali unattached and empty. what's wrong with the word unattached? evryone commented on it when i placed it as my nick on msn. *ponders*

yan's having oral todae. all the best to him. i know he can do it=)

p.s--my hair feels so SOFT todae. hooray!!! *grins*

*think i've come to peace with all my mistakes in life. forgivn by people that i've done wrong to*

--in serenity

something feels missing

something feels empty

what's wrong dear soul?

xx signed off at 2:45 PM

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

heart-ache

the heart aches when it yearns for

someone

something to fill the

emptiness felt within.

still experiencing the aftermaths of watching the world cup in the wee hours of the morning for 2 straight days. my eyes are constantly heavy and the whole body aches. my arm is having cramps from last sunday when i played badminton with uncle. lol. ouchh.

gotta admit my panic button is big coz there's so much to cover before the prelims and u learn to use ur time wisely. but i also cant thelp the fact that im tired. tired of having so much to do. i have a limit. and my self-resistance is wearing real thin. sigh. *i hope to pull thru*

why do you love when love does the very thing hatred brings--hurt. yes. when a loved one mentions something unpleasant, the wound runs deep. the more u love the person, the deeper the wound. homosapiens are selfish beings. thinks self before others. sigh. the truth hurts, but it is the truth. we are cold creatures deep within. sigh. but god is fair. in every black, there is white. behind every calculating mind, there is an archilles heel*.

i just wished i had more of the joys of having poeple to love and even more so..people who love me.

*vulnerability.

the heart aches when the ones it loves

turns its back

and one is left

to bleed alone.

``the rain is here
to celebrate with me
to wash my pain
to bathe me clean
so that when i stand
i'll emerge
as a stronger woman.

xx signed off at 4:46 PM

Monday, July 10, 2006

~weekend~

*yawns*

freaking SLEEPY now. haha. had only a pathetic hour of sleep all in the name of the Fifa World Cup 2006 in which italy won.
tyco.
"-.-
still sore that they won germany in the last 1 minute.
oh well. at least us germans defeted PORTUGAL. woohoo! way to go!!!

still prefer if france won. what a total dumbass zidane was to do the headbutt minutes before the penalty shoot-out. dumb guy. and the dumb coach took out all the good players so none were all that confident during the shoot-out. Barthez(the keeper) was too nervous too catch any ball i s'ppose. and the goal diffrence was only ONE. guess it just aint France's luck. then again, i suppose if Lehmann or Kahn were to be France keeper, it would be an entirely diff story. haha! okok. im being biased. but the finals drama was nice to watch. =)

enuff bout football since it's all over. the ndp parade--for family of participants--was reali nice. i mean it was cool and all. im not patriotic but when you're really in the stadium along with other Singaporeans, u just feel reali belonged and like u lurb s'pore kindda thing. but of coz it just happens during ndp lahh. therex just this indescribable honey feel. ok.

STOP.

before i bable more crap about singapore. haha!

the fireworks were really nice. i always dreamed to just watch the sunset or sunrise or fireworks with someone special. been a childhood fantasy somehow. just makes me feel special u noe. but i guess the day has yet to come for me to witness it with sumone special. im willing to wait=)

then adik..zafy cik sopi&ena came to sleep over to watch the germany-portugal match. superb game. haha. one own goal. haha! by petit. haha!! great match tho. *high*

haha. didnt study at all for the weekend. i mean i tried to but how can i find time in between? haha. played soccer wit bro's and uncle before he left ystrdae. one word-fun! haha. yea2. i noe. im boyish but i recently took a survey and it's shown that im in the middle. 50%boyish 50%girlish. woohoo. yep2. thatx nurril for you. =P

just an intrstink fact to share--

Your Seduction Style: Fantasy Lover

You know that ideal love that each of us dreams of from childhood? That's you!Not because you posess all of the ideal characteristics, but because you are a savvy shape shifter.You have the uncanny ability to detect someone's particular fantasy... and make it you.
You inspire each person to be an idealist and passionate, and you make each moment memorableEven a simple coffee date with you can be the most romantic moment of someone's lifeBy giving your date exactly what he or she desires, you quickly become the ideal lover.
Your abilities to make dreams come true is so strong, that you are often the love of many people's lives.Your ex's (and even people you have simply met or been friends with) long to be yours.No doubt you are the one others have dreamed of... your biggest challenge is finding *your* dream lover.

What Kind of Seducer Are You?

oo..im a fantasy lover seducer. haha!!

someone said something which tugged at my heart. one year passed. sigh. im sorry. i never meant to hurt you. haixx. why do i love then hurt?? haixx. im sorie.

*you*

baby when we are together

doing things

that we love

evrytime you're near

i feel like im in heaven

feeling high

i dont want to let go

i just need you to know..

i dont wanna run away

baby you're the one i need tonight

no promises

baby now i need to hold you tite

i just wanna die in your arms

here tonight

xx signed off at 4:35 PM

Friday, July 07, 2006

whee!

yea!! i change blogskin liao..

wheeeeeeeee

lalalax)

xx signed off at 3:35 PM

finally here to blog for the day. went blog-hopping for awhile just now. found out alot abt other people. haha. now i know. the mask that they put on is long gone. not that i never saw thru it anway. haha. i just pray that one day, they'll feel what i felt. i shall not take revenge coz i'd rather sit back and pray for things to happen.

prayer is the best medicine.

muahahaha.

anyway. had a loong dae today. screwed up my oral ystrdae but come to think of it, i actually said some stuff that made sense so im actually quite satisfied=) happy that i made eye contact with the guy. he just made me feel really homey&although i noe my bahasa was like horrid butwhat the heck? at least i got the points right. haha.

hurt that i found out about those who wrote those stuff now. damn those female dogs. nvm. they will receive the retribution.

amazing that i found out so many things in an hour. all my suspicions were true. thank god i made the right move. haha! serves you right. haha. they're so lucky i didnt sae anything. so lucky.

oh well. this actually proves to show that the words you say allows to give others a glimpse about yourself. and my impression of them has foreva been there so i wasnt surpirsed when they found out. haha!

they sae the silent ones make the most dangerous moves.
i may be noisy on the surface but im still within.

a message to the female dogs:

be careful. u never noe when i might just snap and break you apart. just be careful. one can only take so much.

~~he sent me this song. sigh. did i lurve him? urgh.~~

i didnt mean to fall in love
but i did
and u didnt mean to lurve me back
but u did

true to the only one in my <3

xx signed off at 2:35 PM

Thursday, July 06, 2006

I have bEEn tagged!

HERE GOES!
Rules:#1. Do the following WITHOUT complaint.
#2. Choose 5 people to do this after you've completed yours.
#3. Leave a tag on the person's tagboard to say he/she has been tagged
#4. Start your post with "I have been tagged!" then do this.
------------------------------------------------------

*10 Favourites
Favorite Color: Black, Blue, White.
Favorite Food: hmm. noodles i s'ppose.
Favorite Song: currently-mera haath mein in fanaa
Favorite Movie: pirates of the carribean=)
Favorite Sport:
Favorite Season: winter
Favourite Day Of the Week: hmm. saturday.
Favorite Ice Cream Flavor: choc&cookiesandcream&choc mint.

*9 Currents
Current Mood: lost
Current Taste: my saliva
Current Clothes: tee&pants
Current Desktop: cristiano ronaldo wallpaper!
Current Toenail Color: Natural
Current Time: 1820 hours
Current Surroundings: daddy&mummy's room
Current Annoyance(s): my stagnant phone,ticking clock&irritating brother
Current Thought: past mt oral&a guy.

*8 Firsts
First Best Friend: naqiah
First Crush: primary skul? tink it was alif. sec skul was hafiz. kuang3. x)
First Movie: haha. power ranger???
First Piercing: baby girl
First Lie: "-.- only a psychotic person will rbr.
First Music: britney i think. haha.
First Car: ...

*7 Lasts
Last Drink: refrigerated plain water
Last Car Ride: hmm. sun?
Last Crush: last crush can only happen when u're asking me after i died.
Last Movie Seen: krrish
Last Phone Call: alisa
Last CD Played: bunty aur babli. lalalax)

*6 Have You Evers
Have You Ever Dated One Of Your Best Friends: yep
Have You Ever Broken the Law: i litter. is that considered?
Have You Ever Been Arrested: do i look like i have?
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: *dotx*
Have You Ever Been on TV: yeap.
Have You Ever Kissed Someone You Didn't Know: nahh. aint that cheap.

*5 Things Youre Wearing
1. GERMANY jersey. haha.
2. leaf-printed pants
3. peach hairband
4. necklace
5. bra/panties?

*4 Things Youve Done Today
1. go school/take oral
2. sms /chat
3. listen to songs
4. blog

*3 Things You Can Hear RightNow.
1. where'd you go by fort minor
2. typing of the keyboard
3. bunch of dumbasses screamin at the playgrd.

*2 Things You Cant Live Without
1. food
2. water

*1 Thing You Do When Youre Bored
1. read. bookworm me B)

And for the 5 people,(IF U WANNA DO.its ALOT MANNN!!HEHE)
-aziz
-becky
-harlin
-alisa
-lina

xx signed off at 6:17 PM

An Ideal Husband

Instructions: List 8 different qualities you look for in a lover.
Please don't forget to mention the gender. =D

gender- MALE. duh. +.+

``im so not bisexual. haha.

humorous/light-hearted

i just enjoy the company of a guy that's light-hearted and amble to joke around while knowing his limits. a total turn-on.

2. romantic

i take PURE literature. cant help it if i dream of getting prince charming that will sweep me off my feet..save me from dragons and bring me to the mountains right? =p

3. understanding

damn. this is REALLY important coz im sortta a very subdued person and i dont tell much so the guy im with has to be able to understand my actions n not take it wrongly coz when i scream at you it means i lurb u. and when i shut up n just look at you, it means im hurt and u're in deep SHIT. muahahahah.

4. gentleman-ly

hahax. i still lurve the traditonal gentleman who opens the doors, carries the bag & pull the chairs. hahax.

5. patient

lol. i totali need a patient guy coz im like a hot-headed stubborn gurl. aka im like fire. so i need a COOL guy that will calm me down and tolerate my mood swings&stubborn self. haha!

6. intelligent

okok. im not being biased here but intelligent guys are reali attractv. doesnt reali matter if he's street smart or book smart. and guys that are handy are also kiute! it would be nice to have sumone repairing the stuff.

7. independant

im independant so i need a guy tht's all independant yet very reliable. mainly coz i often need a shoulder to cry on yet at the same time i dun lyk to depend on sumone too much.

8. manly

haha. i LURVE guys that appeal as the strong protectv kind.(of coz not overly-protectv) guess coz my dad n brox are lyddat so i like strong, sporty, manly kindda guys. i mean he needs to have the male X-factor. haha!

of coz if he's good looking that's be a major plus.

also need a guy thatx caring¬ dominant. i cant stand EGO. total turn OFF. really. n sumone who's very good with handling money wld be nice coz i enjoy spending evry single penny on me n i DUN save. hahaha.

btw. i SCREWED up my malay olevel oral BIG TIME. superr sian. hope that doesnt pull my grades down. sigh. *tinking*

missed the match ysteerdae bt still ecstatic that FRANCE won. haha. an zidane scored it. totaly hoping that france would make it this year instead of italy coz i im still sore abt italy beating germany. hmph.

waited for lisa for 20 mins when in the end she didnt cum skul. *rolling eyes* bathed in the rain and now im SICK. dumb.

~~people hear what they want to hear. so does it mean u dun want to hear me out?~~

im escaping into romanticism coz i refuse to face the harshness of reality.

p.s had a chat with A. sigh. such good memories. sumtimes i think that i chose B bcoz of A. they're really so similar. mayb i loved A and had that part hidden till i met B. sigh. im like C. mayb A chose C coz of me. sigh. confusing. betta not think about it.

Let the bygones be bygones

xx signed off at 5:34 PM

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

damn. im falling in love with him all over again. haha.
#01 philipp lahm. my german hero.

tell me why. why does he have to be sooo HOT. damn. =P
#02 cristiano ronaldo

*tink i just have this thing for guys that play sports. mainly football. haha!

peace out.

xx signed off at 4:24 PM

GERMANY LOST

ALMOST cried. but didnt. haha.

omg. i so cannot believe it! italy was so freaking LUCKY. serious. i mean they scored 2 goals within 1 minute. HELLO! thatx not S-K-I-L-L kk?

had to face the hasrh tormentings from the others. namely :-

sufyan
rabia
cik shaufi
erin
lina
hong jun
zuan zhe
dad&brothers

can u believe it?? mean people. woke up at three for NUTINK coz the italians scored in the last min n 30 seconds. dumb mafias.

nvm. FRANCE ALL THE WAY.

wanted to support portugal bt it wld make me a whole lot happier if france won since france DEFEATED brazil. yea! a way to get back at our dear brazil fans. muahahaha.

anyway. todae is my anni. hehex. yea. one more month. yea. hehex. have a surprise planned for nxt mth. was tinking of buying that instead of sharing the amt. think it'll be sweeter dun u tink? hehex.

really sleepy now. im still gonna watch da match at 3am despite school and despite the fact that i'll be SUPERR tired since tmr we end at 3.45 but im willing to do it. all in the name of the world cup. hahax.

anyway..betta be off now. wanna do hw. den sleep. den wake up. den eat. den sleep. den wake up. den watch bola. den sleep. den wake up. den go skul. haha.

im a nuthead. cant help it. =p

muahx!

~~if thatx wad u say. then im sorie. sorie to have hurt you. sorie.~~

~~yes. itx my fault. always mine.~~

*sighx*

xx signed off at 3:45 PM

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

HOT HOT HOT!
wadx football without the cute footballers?? =p

``fernando torres from spain

just check out the HOT body that comes with the HOT image!! woohoo. he's gotta be THE most good-looking players man! go portugal! (can u see the resemblance btwn the two??) *ponders*

`cristiano ronaldo

``miroslav klose.

okok. he aint that hot BUT he's my German HERO.

``philip lahm=)

ALL HAIL GERMANY. woohoo! nbr 1 germany fan here. =p

germany is so totali gonna win italy and im gonna watch the match at three. even though therex school 2ml. i mean. itx GERMANY man!! haha. =P

cacth you guys 2ml!

xx signed off at 5:19 PM

hey. just wanted to sae THANK YOU to all these people for causing such a drastic change in my life=)

(not in order of merit)

sufyan --for understanding&appreciating&loving me as ME. be it good or bad.
harlin --for being the sister i never had. the best friend that wld stick thru my crap. and the most loving cousin one could ever ask for.
aziz --for seeing me thru in my toughest times. caring for me&being there to cheer me up with your antics.
rabia --for being my punching back. the one i bully. the one i cry and laugh with. the one who puts up wit my crap n mood swings&understanding my weird ways.
yusa --for being the monkey in my life&still stick with me depsite the countless times i screamed at you.
zati,illia,mirah,iL&cha --for being the very few people who knows me inside out and still appreciate me.
hongjun --for bein one of the few people thatx been so sweet to me despite the stuff i did. for aking me smile&feel betta.
alisa&lina --my partner in crime. my crappy buddies. thankyou for lighting up my life.
fiz --for giving me the best 'guy' advice&for never failing to be there to make me smile.

so. thanx guys for making my life a whole lot more meaningful. =)

spot nbr 10. goes to that certain someone that im finally saying goodbye to. haix. thank you for all you had to offer. s'ppose it's too late now. u've left a scar too deep. sigh. maybe it's better if we stay this way. without any contact. itx wad YOU want right? haix. goodbye.

~~look into my eyes&say u meant every word you said.~~

xx signed off at 4:28 PM

Monday, July 03, 2006

hurt yet once again by the man i once loved. mayb i should stop caring about you. no. i MUST stop caring about you. all i wanted was to be there for you. have you ever thought abt that?? yes. u say ur life is hard. hello! everyone faces challenges in life. it jst comes in diffrent forms and at diffrnt times. u never understood the fact that i CARED. damn it. and i still do. why dont u ever try to understand that little part of me. u never did and that was why i left you. u are always preocuppied with yourself. have always been and will always be.

i tried to understand you. reach out to you but u never let me in. u say i dun undrstd the struggles you have to go thru but perhaps if u had more faith u'll pull thru. instead of questioning life. questioning god. ur world revolves around yourself. yes. sometimes we have to be selfish. bt does it also apply to the ones that care? yes. i've hurt you. have you ever thought if u've hurt me? i've spent so much time. so many years trying to cure all the wounds ive given you. yet im still not forgiven. still not appreciated. still nothing in your eyes.

say wad you want. i dont care anymore. im used to all your curses since i was 13.

hurt. scarred. but you dun care and this time i realise. u dun need me. u dun need my listenin ear. u dun need anything coz u have all the other people in life to help u. n i dun mean crap to u. wadeva.

~~hurt twice. and this time i wun forget. wadx the use of crying when the one you cry for is too self-centered to notice.~~

xx signed off at 11:53 AM